Desire and love will come!

When I was single, and trust me my friends I was single for a VERY long time, two things used to happen on a regular basis. Firstly, well meaning friends who were, inevitably, smugly loved up would say things like “oh things happen when you least expect them to! If you keep looking you will never find him!’ And so on and so on and on and on…
The other thing that used to happen was that I would make major announcements, usually after one too many glasses of fizz, and say things like “I have a theory, in every social group there will always be one person who stays single forever and that will be ME!”
This was usually met with long sighs and a very rapid change of subject because they had all heard it all before!
Being single can get repetitive and even boring let alone lonely, depressing and frustrating, but I think the important thing to do is not to let it define who you are. Focussing on what you don’t have or don’t like about your life will only create a self-fulfilling prophecy and the one thing you don’t want is to be single forever.
Embracing being single can be just as difficult as being in denial about it but we all tend to be very good at convincing ourselves that we are fine and dandy being on our own. The important thing to remember here is the H word! honesty! The other important thing to remember is that there is no point in being in a relationship for the sake of it. The single life is often thrust upon us and is not always a conscious life choice so making the most of what we have and the situation we find ourselves in has to be more positive than moaning about it or pretending that everything is fine. When clearly it isn’t.
I know it is easy for me to say, but there is great credence in the act of desiring changes to your life rather than needing it. By being negative and needy and wanting something desperately you will only attract needy people to your life. Instead keep searching for love on line, but adjust your attitude to one of desiring a great person into your life rather than needing them. We can all be alone and cope with it if we have to, but if we are honest most of us intend to spend and share our life with someone at some point. So don’t give up! Keep on looking but take a look at what you are thinking and saying as the universe has a weird habit of attracting negatives into our lives! Desire..desire..desire and love will come. I promise! It did for me.

Published by Sarah Adams

I am the author of The Life Edit, an eight step personal development coaching programme that harnesses the power of journalling and writing to help people make transformational changes to their lives. I am also journalist and writer who has worked for newspapers, magazines, TV and online for the last 35 years, and an accredited personal development practitioner. I have written books, appeared on TV and radio and have worked in the world of corporate communications as a senior manager. I launched and ran The Community Media Group for ten years-this is a social enterprise that exists to produce professional, community newspapers in socially challenging areas as well as providing free training.

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